Dear Reader,
Has it really been 3 months since I last wrote to you? My apologies. Dog, Pony, LandLady and I have been busy. We have had house breaks (Pony found an open door) and growling (Pony stepped on Dog and Dog was not amused). There have been many stuffed kongs of happiness (peanut butter & bananas, frozen peaches, yogurt) and learning moments ("See Dog, when Pony quietly lets me cut his nails, he gets treats. Why don't you try it?") and romps at the dog park.
And then, as life was starting to get a bit routine, Dog turned to drugs.
Actually the drugs were an accident. She was really after chocolate brownies, and it just so happened that they were pot brownies*.
In a scene reminiscent of the Toast Snatching Incident, I found Dog munching her contraband brownies in LandLady's sitting room. It takes a lot of chocolate to kill a dog of Dog's size, so I, being unaware of the brownie's active ingredient, had no immediate concerns beyond figuring out where the brownies had come from and preparing (yet another) apology to LandLady for my miscreant pet's food snatching ways.
It was LandLady who panicked and grabbed her laptop to try and identify the effect of marijuana on greyhounds. But at the end of 10 minutes of searching, it seemed that a) people's dogs eat a lot of things that aren't good for them, b) much of this is chocolate, c) it takes a lot of marijuana to damage a small dog. So, since it was bedtime anyway, I led Dog back upstairs to sleep it off.
For the last few weeks, Dog has been sharing the bed with me, and since she doesn't share well, I've been trying to train her to keep to her side. But I find that her responsiveness to instruction, always iffy, is greatly reduced in her current state, and there was only so much heaving of greyhound butt that I was in the mood for last night. So, she slept in the middle of the bed, on her side, legs out all night almost without moving. No twitching paws, no circling to switch position.
Until she threw up chocolate brownie all over the sheets.
(And I only have one set of sheets for the bed...)
But after I had pushed and pulled and finally persuaded a confused and uncertain Dog to get down off the bed so that I could start a load of laundry, scrounged clean sheets from the pile of ratty dog stuff, and we had both resettled, she went back to silent stillness.
This morning, Dog continues to be mellow. When I force her to get up, she's a little uncertain on her feet and more hesitant than usual on the stairs. But she ate her breakfast... and then threw that up in her crate along with a piece of the plastic bag the brownies came in.
Have you ever tried to persuade a stoned 65 pound dog to leave a crate without tracking barf over your kitchen floor? No? It's a little bit tricky.
One of the internet recommendations for settling dog stomachs was goat's milk kefer, and LandLady's latest AirBnB guests conveniently left some in the fridge. So Dog is on an hourly ration of kefer to keep her hydrated until she's back to her active self.
And I'm going to do yet another load of laundry.
And LandLady is finding a better hiding place for her brownies!
Wishing you a restful Sunday,
~~ LeAn
PS. Watch what you eat; chocolate is the *real* gateway drug.
*Legal. Medicinal. Just to be clear.
Has it really been 3 months since I last wrote to you? My apologies. Dog, Pony, LandLady and I have been busy. We have had house breaks (Pony found an open door) and growling (Pony stepped on Dog and Dog was not amused). There have been many stuffed kongs of happiness (peanut butter & bananas, frozen peaches, yogurt) and learning moments ("See Dog, when Pony quietly lets me cut his nails, he gets treats. Why don't you try it?") and romps at the dog park.
And then, as life was starting to get a bit routine, Dog turned to drugs.
Actually the drugs were an accident. She was really after chocolate brownies, and it just so happened that they were pot brownies*.
In a scene reminiscent of the Toast Snatching Incident, I found Dog munching her contraband brownies in LandLady's sitting room. It takes a lot of chocolate to kill a dog of Dog's size, so I, being unaware of the brownie's active ingredient, had no immediate concerns beyond figuring out where the brownies had come from and preparing (yet another) apology to LandLady for my miscreant pet's food snatching ways.
It was LandLady who panicked and grabbed her laptop to try and identify the effect of marijuana on greyhounds. But at the end of 10 minutes of searching, it seemed that a) people's dogs eat a lot of things that aren't good for them, b) much of this is chocolate, c) it takes a lot of marijuana to damage a small dog. So, since it was bedtime anyway, I led Dog back upstairs to sleep it off.
For the last few weeks, Dog has been sharing the bed with me, and since she doesn't share well, I've been trying to train her to keep to her side. But I find that her responsiveness to instruction, always iffy, is greatly reduced in her current state, and there was only so much heaving of greyhound butt that I was in the mood for last night. So, she slept in the middle of the bed, on her side, legs out all night almost without moving. No twitching paws, no circling to switch position.
Until she threw up chocolate brownie all over the sheets.
(And I only have one set of sheets for the bed...)
But after I had pushed and pulled and finally persuaded a confused and uncertain Dog to get down off the bed so that I could start a load of laundry, scrounged clean sheets from the pile of ratty dog stuff, and we had both resettled, she went back to silent stillness.
This morning, Dog continues to be mellow. When I force her to get up, she's a little uncertain on her feet and more hesitant than usual on the stairs. But she ate her breakfast... and then threw that up in her crate along with a piece of the plastic bag the brownies came in.
Have you ever tried to persuade a stoned 65 pound dog to leave a crate without tracking barf over your kitchen floor? No? It's a little bit tricky.
One of the internet recommendations for settling dog stomachs was goat's milk kefer, and LandLady's latest AirBnB guests conveniently left some in the fridge. So Dog is on an hourly ration of kefer to keep her hydrated until she's back to her active self.
And I'm going to do yet another load of laundry.
And LandLady is finding a better hiding place for her brownies!
Wishing you a restful Sunday,
~~ LeAn
PS. Watch what you eat; chocolate is the *real* gateway drug.
*Legal. Medicinal. Just to be clear.
Best laugh I have had in a long time! So sorry Lesley. Hope she is better soon!
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